SPENDING THE FIRST FATHER’S DAY WITHOUT DAD. 5 TIPS ON HOW TO SURVIVE.
May 15, 2023
If you’ve lost a parent it's normal to feel apprehension and even dread as holidays like Father’s Day approach. That first Father’s Day without your dad can intensify your loss. If dad was a grounding force in your life you can feel untethered and isolated. You’re likely to feel unsure how to navigate a day that’s dedicated to celebrating someone no longer with you.There’s no magic way to make this day easy. But we hope sharing 5 tips on how to survive can help you feel empowered to find your way.
- Feel Fully. It’s OK to let yourself fully experience what you are feeling. Feelings of sadness, anger, wanting and pain are normal and expected. Don’t judge yourself or feel like you’re letting anyone down. Give yourself permission to feel the way you do. If you can sit with these feelings, acknowledge them and accept them, then you will have more power to be comfortable with these very human emotions.
- Celebrate A Positive Male Role Model. Celebrating another male role model in your life can bring you comfort and help you feel less untethered. Celebrating what someone else has meant to you can bring joy and remind you that love and support still surrounds you.
- Focus On Happy Memories. Memories are where your father can continue to live long after his passing. Memories of happier times remind us of the joy and love he had in his life. Memories can also help us process loss. Remembrance can help you refocus on gratitude for the time you had with him in your life. Gratitude is powerful. When you are able to look with gratitude on the wonderful memories of the past and the coming memories of tomorrow with others you love, you can begin to heal.
- Spend Time With Others. Spending time with others who loved him can make you feel his presence. Ask others to share their favorite memories or stories of your dad. You may learn new things about your father’s life and gain new memories to hold close. Seeing what he meant to others can help you realize he is not really gone, he also lives in the hearts and minds of all of you.
- Distract Yourself. It’s OK to completely skip Father’s Day. When nothing else feels right, plan an activity to distract yourself. Plan something that will help occupy your mind and help you escape the day. Go out of town to explore someplace new, plan an adventure you have never done before, treat yourself to a staycation at a fancy hotel, pamper yourself. So much about Father’s Day can be a sensory overload - places, sounds, smells that trigger memories, and all those social media posts of happy family celebrations. If you are simply not ready to face Father’s Day, escaping somewhere new can help.
Your first Father’s Day without your dad will not be easy. But it can feel empowering and then hopeful when you are able to navigate the day. We hope these suggestions help you find what peace and comfort you can. If you also lost your mom, then you may find our blog How To Survive Mother’s Day insightful. Remember that grief is a personal journey; allow yourself to travel at your own pace.
Honoring your dad on Father’s Day after he has passed can be a meaningful and healing experience. Here are ten ways to remember and celebrate him: 1 - Wear or Carry Something of His – A watch, a shirt, a piece of jewelry—something that belonged to him can provide comfort and keep his presence close. 2 - Dedicate a Song or Playlist – Create a playlist of songs that remind you of moments you’ve shared together. 3 - Recreate a moment in time – Recreate a favorite memory (fishing trip, movie night, road trip) 4 - Plan a Dad’s night out - plan an outing to one of his favorite places. It could be a restaurant, a game, or simply a scenic spot. 5 - Plan a Dad’s night in - Invite family and friends over to reminisce and serve a buffet of his favorite foods. 6 - Build Something Meaningful - if you’re good with your hands, build something he would have liked. If you’re not you can always buy something like a bird house and mount it outside in his honor or have a memory bear made from some of his favorite clothes. 7 - Frame Something – buy a store-bought frame or go to a frame shop. Frame a quote, his quote or one that he liked. Or frame a photo of one of his favorite things like a sports team photo, a movie scene image, or a favorite athlete or musician. 8 - Create a Video or Slideshow – Gather old photos and videos, and compile them into a slideshow with music that he loved. 9 - Honor His Legacy – Start an interactive tradition in his honor like a family gathering, storytelling night, or community service. 10 - Plant Forget-me-nots in a favorite place or deliver potted Forget-me-nots to others that miss him too. No matter how you choose to honor your dad, focus on the love you have for him and realize and embrace that he loved you. He wouldn’t want you to cry all day, he would want you to smile and remember the good moments. Read also how to survive your first Father’s day without Dad .
Losing a mother is never easy, and Mother’s Day can be an emotional time. Honoring her memory in meaningful ways can bring comfort and keep her spirit alive. Here are ten thoughtful ways to honor the memory of Mom this Mother’s Day: 1. Visit Her Resting Place Spend time at her gravesite or memorial, bringing fresh flowers, her favorite items, or just sitting and reflecting on her love and legacy. 2. Cook Her Favorite Meal Prepare a dish she loved or a recipe she passed down. Sharing a meal in her honor can be a comforting way to feel close to her. 3. Write Her a Letter Express how much you miss her, update her on your life, or share a special memory. Writing can be a powerful way to process emotions and keep her close. 4. Light a Candle in Her Memory Lighting a candle in her honor can be a quiet, reflective way to feel her presence and express your love. 5. Look Through Old Photos & Videos Take time to revisit cherished moments by flipping through photo albums or watching home videos . It’s a beautiful way to celebrate her life and legacy. 6. Do Something She Loved Whether it’s gardening, painting, reading, or taking a walk in nature, engaging in her favorite activities can be a meaningful tribute. 7. Make a Donation in Her Name Give to a charity or cause she cared about . It’s a wonderful way to extend her kindness and make a difference in her honor. 8. Create a Memory Book or Scrapbook Compile photos, letters, and stories into a scrapbook or digital memory book that keeps her spirit alive for future generations. 9. Plant a Tree or Flowers in Her Honor Planting something in her memory can be a lasting tribute, symbolizing growth, love, and the continuation of her legacy. 10. Spend Time with Family & Share Stories Gather with loved ones to reminisce, share stories, and celebrate the love she gave. Keeping her memory alive through storytelling can be healing and uplifting. No matter how you choose to honor your mom, the most important thing is to celebrate the love and impact she had on your life. We hope these 10 ways to honor the memory of Mom this Mother’s Day helps readers celebrate this Mother’s Day. Also read here about surviving the first Mother’s Day without Mom .